About Callahans
From Callahan's Wiki
An Introduction to #Callahans
So, what is this #Callahans anyway? We get asked that fairly often, so this is the place to find out. If Callahan’s is not a familiar name to you, it is the name of a fictional bar on Long Island, created by Spider Robinson. It is the setting for a truly delightful series of short stories about an eclectic collection of barflies who make merry, commit atrocious puns, and incidentally save the world on occasion.
Callahan’s is presided over by Mike Callahan, a large lovable Irishman who smokes foul cigars and cracks even fouler puns. He dispenses drinks for fifty cents each, and whether or not you get your change back from your dollar bill depends upon whether or not you exercise your option. “Huh?” you ask. Callahan’s has a somewhat odd tradition. Dominating the bar is a large fireplace. In front of the fireplace is a line on the floor, and when one feels the need, one can go to the line and propose a toast.
In Callahan’s, a toast is not simply “Cheers”, it can be many things, a baring of the soul, exposing wounds of the heart, or simply an expression of wonder or delight in the world and the people in it. Or disgust. While at the line, the toaster has the undivided attention of the rest of the patrons, skilled listeners all. When one has finished unburdening oneself, they hurl their glass into the fireplace. Most of the others’ glasses join in, foregoing the change back from the dollar.
Why on earth would people do this you ask? Simple, in Callahan’s there is a common belief, ‘Shared pain is lessened, shared joy increased. Thus do we defeat entropy.’ Sharing is the key to the toast. Share your fears, your sadness, your delight, your awe, your embarrassment. Or not. A toast of ‘Life Sucks!’ is complete, and no one will pry. If they do try to pry, Fast Eddy, the bandy little piano player, will slip his blackjack from his boot and relive you of your consciousness.
Enough about Spider Robinson’s Callahan’s, time to move on to #Callahans. #c, as we often refer to it, is but one of many incarnations of Callahan’s to exist on the web. As there is no ‘real world’ version, and Mike’s is a great place to make merry, we made our own version. Like Spider’s characters, we too believe in sharing pain and joy. We also share puns, so consider yourself warned. And like Mike’s bar, we do not tolerate prying. We may not have Fast Eddy at the piano, but anyone wearing a @ in front of their name will fill in for him.
What is prying? That is up to the questioned. 99.999% of the time, if one feels a question is snoopy, simply declining to give an answer defines it. Or giving a silly answer, and we have no shortage of those. Persisting in asking though, WILL be seen as snoopy, and may result in a Fast Eddy kick.
OK, we do not like snoops. What else defines us? Sharing. I’ve used the word several times, and will use it several more. As the Undernet is a text medium, all we can share is words. No topic is off limits, though some will not win you friends. Opinions, like assholes, are something everyone has. Just don’t be an asshole with your opinion, and respect those of others. We are a collection of individuals from many corners of the globe, and all have our opinions. #Callahans, just like a real world bar, depends on the patrons playing well with each other. If a topic offends or annoys you, be patient, another will be along shortly.
The key to sharing in the Place is listening. After all, if you want to say whatever you want, you must give others the same right. It is called free speech, and we take it seriously. If you disagree with what some one says, feel free to say so, and why. That is called discussion. “<nick> you are an idiot/asshole” is not discussion. It may well be a true statement, but it is not discussion. Verbal attacks like that will not be tolerated. In the heat of debate, tempers may flair, that is human. Keeping them in check is civilised. Be civil. We don’t care if you are human or not, as long as you are civil.
On the subject of listening, it is very hard to listen to someone if you /ignore them. As in any group, there are those who you find annoying. Tough. If, after a while you just can’t stand what they have to say, then /ignore can be your friend. We do ask you to use it wisely, as a last resort, not as a response to anything you don’t want to hear. Even jerks and morons can say witty or insightful things, why deprive yourself of them.
One last rule. Be merry. The real world can be an unpleasant place at times, and #Callahans is often our refuge from it. If you come in in a foul mood, get a drink from Mike, step up to the line and unburden yourself. We will listen. When you are done, throw your unhappiness/pain into the fireplace along with your glass. Remember, the founding principle of #Callahans is “Shared pain is lessened, shared joy increased”.
